Teen Mom 2 Season 4 Episode 12 FINALE

Okay guys, It's the 90 minute season finale... and possibly the series finale! Also tonight are the unseen moments and a preview of the reunion, but I'm only recapping the finale. I don't know how I could possibly be more excited. I bet this finale is packed with action, mystery, and intrigue self-pity, self-indulgence, excuses, and heroin-fueled rants about how tough it is to be a mom (kind of) while trying to do literally NOTHING else in life.

The only appealing clip of the unseen moments is one in which Jenelle is yelling at Barbara that she can't get a tattoo because of Gary. Then, Gary tries to stop her from backing out o the driveway by ... doing the above!

We start off with Leah planning her week in Ohio with her husband and ex-husband to run more tests on the baby. Her next scene is also about preparing to go to the doctor. Ali is at the hospital for her tests. The doctor will give results tomorrow, meanwhile Ali wants to call Aleeah and it's the CUTEST phone call you've ever heard in your life! The doctor comes back and I really don't hear much of anything new. It's probably a muscle disorder, but a biopsy is still needed. Finally, the muscle biopsy takes place. I'm pleased to hear Leah say she doesn't know how much more "Corey and I" can take.  Sucha  difference from that delusional cunt bag, Kailyn, who thinks that her new husband can replace the actual father of her child. I digress... They truly co-parent so well. It's sad to seem them have to sedate their scared child and await life-altering test results. It's also sad that only one parent gets to be present. It's funny to see Ali all goofy and sedated! Leah holds it togther just long enough to get out of the room. Then, her smile fades to tears, then to sobbing. You can really see how much she and Corey love their children. Jeremy is very supportive of both of them. I do not like Leah, but I respect her effort. Ali is out of surgery and she's got a fab support system.

Kailyn is telling us more about getting married at the courthouse because she can't contain her undying love for Javi even one more minute! so she and Isaac can have military benefits. She admits that they've only been engaged for a few days. I admit that I hate her. Neither of the witnesses are friends or family of Kailyn HAHA! That's because you have none. Okay, Kailyn and Javi are married. It was a 20 minute ceremony. Isaac is screaming crying because Kailyn just forced him to call Javi's mom Grandma because he wants juice. Kailyn is discussing her wedding her friends and of course the subject of moving away from Jo is a natural topic. Plans of a bitter bitch, I see you girl! Kailyn goes to a diner with Jo to discuss going to therapy to discuss things. She drops the bomb that she married Javi and she gets health insurance right away and Javi gets paid more.

Jo:  "Oh, it's all about the money."
Kailyn: No. Number one: we decided to get married so Isaac and I can go with him if he gets stationed somewhere."
Jo: "I just hope you still think its the right thing in five years or in ten years..."

Commerical scene: Now we are back to Kailyn's wedding day. Kailyn and Javi are walking up their driveway and  Javi offers to carry her over the threshold. She says that she would rather punch him in the face. Martial bliss! (Javi, she'll do it! You know from experience!) Javi is given his basic training date. He and Kailyn have the sads because they are going to be separated for about six months. Kailyn immediately takes it to custody of Isaac and moving him out of state.
Javi is getting ready to leave for basic and he puts Isaac to bed. Its really sweet. He cries. It's almost like Isaac is his son. Except, you know, he is NOT Javi's son. Javi leaves. Kailyn cries.


Chelsea is going back to hair school. YAWN. Oh great, she's talking about Adam. She says that this will continue for the rest of her GODDAMN LIFE. ZZzzzzzz.
Chelsea is supposed to go back to school today but she's exctly where she always is: on the big red couch with a blanket warding off responsibility. She's running late because she stayed up too late last night, doing nothing. She asks Aubrey for permission to skip today, her first day back... She has Aubrey call her father and tell him that "Mommy woke up late and she'll go to school tomorrow." Aubrey does NOT take on her mothers responsibility. Chelsea thinks her father should cut her some slack because she like does way more than anyone thought she would do. OMG! Chelsea and Aubrey have a secret handshake and it's really cute! It's cute enough to make me forget that a three year old is wearing lipgloss.
Okay, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Aubrey wants to sleep, so she locked Chelsea out of the room and went back to sleep. Naturally, she calls Randy to solve all of her problems. Randy is not surprised at the days events. As soon as her problem is solved, Randy gets the boot. Chelsea has a conversation with Aubrey about locking  the door and being selfish. Chelsea calls school to tell them she is running late and the counselor is like "God, I wonder if you'll even make it to graduation day! Pull it together, girlie!" Chelsea walks into class and uses her loudest and most squeaky baby voice of all time. The girls clearly hate her.
Papa Randy comes over for a pow-wow and Chelsea asks if we thought she wouldn't go back to school. No. No, we did not think you would. Chelsea keeps referencing achievements, but I can;t figure out what she;s talking about? Talk naturally turns to Adam. So, she's beat school and Adam to death... is she about to tell us she's moving?

Jenelle is SUPER angry with Babs because she and her boyfriend went to Jenelle's house and tried to have an intervention. The next scene is the most telling: Jace calls Barbara MOMMA! This kid knows who is really there for him. Barbara is practically crying because she has discovered that Jenelle is not actually high on weed... but on HEROIN. She seems genuinely concerned, but like a true enabler she places the blame with Kieffer. She resolves to try to have her daughter committed to the psychiatric hospital in hopes of saving Jenelle's life. This is so sad, especially knowing how it all turns out. Jenelle was arrested this week for heroin and domestic abuse.
Jenelle and Kieffer are discussing the events of the intervention.

Jenelle: I caaaaaan't beeeelieeeeveeee thhhhhhey caaaaaaame iiiiiiiiin heeerreeeee (Jenelle is SO drugged up it's not funny)
Kieffer: I SHOULD HAVE BUST MIKES FACE IN! HE ASKED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AND I TOLD HIM NO HE COULD NOT USE THE BATHROOM! I DON'T CARE IF IT WAS A HEROIN NEEDLE HE STOLE PROPERTY FROM OUR HOUSE! He didnt leave when we asked him to AND he touched me thats assault!
Jenelle: This was home invasion
Kieffer: Yeah we need to run and press charges on them today
Jenelle: That will cause more drama
Kieffer: They need to be punished
Jenelle: I haven't seen Jace in two weeks. She's using him in a spiteful way! I give up. I'll just have to get custody back. It's hard to stay sober because getting high lets you forget all of your problems
Keiffer: Its hard to stay sober because I want to be high.

Barbara looks haggard. You know she's truly worried about her daughter. She went to the magistrate and they sided with her immediately. The sheriff is on his way to Jenelle's right now to bring her in for a mental and physical evaluation. Now, poor Babs has to rush home so she can get ready for work. I feel for her. When Jenelle finds out what her mom has done... Here go Hell come!
Jenelle spent three hours (allegedly) in the hospital being evaluated. She says she is furious. Kieffer really wants to press charges on Barbara, now.
Jenelle is taking Kieffer (because he can't drive) to the courthouse (to press charges on her mother and Mike) and she sounds like she's high as a kite. They are resolute that this is the right thing to do. I am resolute that this will become the difference between Jenelle and Kieffer and Jenelle and Jace.  Babs is charged with trespassing. Mike was charged with trespassing and assault. I am outraged and sure that these charges will be dropped.
Barbara and Mike are discussing their court date for the charges Kieffer is pressing. Babs starting crying and says that she needs to walk away from Jenelle because she sees that the situation is hurting Jace. She is truly sick about the situation and she fears her daughter will die. Its NOT funny. It's heartbreaking. To make things worse, Jace asks to go to Jenelle's house and Barbara has to say that she is sick and contagious so they can't go. Cut to Jenelle and Kieffer looking frantically for pills they've lost in the house. These two are REALLY tweeked out. Have you ever heard a drug-fueled love fest? It's on MTV's Teen Mom!

Kieffer: you better have found my goddamned pills
Jenelle: Little petty fights like this, thats all thats happened these past two months and Im really happy
Kieffer: because we love each other
Jenelle: Now that we pressed charges on my mom she better get the point
Kieffer: thanks for finding my pills baby
(Hes eating her neck)
Jenelle: Everything going to be fine. I have a lot of jobs.

Okay, these two people are so high they are falling asleep.
It's pathetic and disgusting!


Reunion Preview:
Jenelle feels bad for herself
Leah is proud of how far she's cpome
Chelsea might be hooking up with Adam
Kailyn walks out crying saying everyone sucks and should leave her alone.